Colorado, USA
- Tweets 90,499
- Following 7,015
- Followers 16,879
- Likes 128,903
Pinned Tweet
*watching Pulp Fiction*
You know…a five dollar milkshake actually sounds pretty reasonable.
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Benny Boy retweeted
One of few things I don't miss from the 90s is people saying "alrighty then" in that Jim Carrey voice.
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RT @NatalieGABand: Doctor: you shouldn’t take Ibuprofen everyday. It can damage your liver.
Patient: Okay, can I get a medication for the…
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Benny Boy retweeted
know what's a fact that absolutely melts my brain if I think about it?
Violent Femmes - Blister in the Sun is from 1983
there's "ahead of its time" and there's "nailed the mid 90s from a decade out like a halfcourt shot"
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Benny Boy retweeted
shaving my balls before going to the dentist just in case
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Benny Boy retweeted
Ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted strangers on the internet to find me mildly amusing.
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Benny Boy retweeted
He’s not a versatile musician.
One song.
One day of the week.
Every week.
Yes, it is Friday.
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Benny Boy retweeted
You’re not an outlaw, you’re a bootlicker lacking critical thinking skills
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Benny Boy retweeted
“We want grandchildren” best I can do is talk about my penis on twitter
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Benny Boy retweeted
as an adult you literally have 30 minutes to celebrate a win until you face another inconvenience
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Benny Boy retweeted
ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted random men to come along and mansplain things to me like i’m stupid
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Benny Boy retweeted
*cat in front of me, cat to the left of me*
Son emerges from his boy-cave: Hey what’s up?
Me: Ohhh nothing, just surrounded by pussy.
Son: *record scratch* WHAT?!
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If we’re having an argument and I say “DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY!” that means the argument is over.
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